AKA Max and I drove to New York to be with my Mom and the rest of the gang for Passover while Diana went to Toronto to spend Passover with her Dad and family. We had a great time with everyone, ate lots, yada, yada, yada.
Carpe Diem.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
The Stockholm syndrome
Strange title for this post but I think it's appropriate.
Speaking from experience, something strange happens when you are battling cancer and you are given good news. It is something akin to the Stockholm syndrome. You are so resigned to the treatments and medications that you become reliant and dependent on what you are being given. All of a sudden, when the treatments stop because of good, positive scans, you seem to flail around looking for more treatment or more medication. Almost not wanting to accept the good news for fear that it may eventually turn to bad news. You come to accept the grind and expect it to go on indefinitely. Well, the hell with your "captors"!
The reality is scary/weird. You will always be looking over your shoulder, so to speak. You will always live scan to scan. The quality comes from how you choose to live that time between scans - Carpe Diem. What's over your shoulder shouldn't concern you - every day is a gift. Whatever happens, you have to deal with it. I have found out that you cannot run from this.
No, I'm not stoned or on heavy meds. Just imparting some worldly bits of drivel.
Carpe Diem.
Speaking from experience, something strange happens when you are battling cancer and you are given good news. It is something akin to the Stockholm syndrome. You are so resigned to the treatments and medications that you become reliant and dependent on what you are being given. All of a sudden, when the treatments stop because of good, positive scans, you seem to flail around looking for more treatment or more medication. Almost not wanting to accept the good news for fear that it may eventually turn to bad news. You come to accept the grind and expect it to go on indefinitely. Well, the hell with your "captors"!
The reality is scary/weird. You will always be looking over your shoulder, so to speak. You will always live scan to scan. The quality comes from how you choose to live that time between scans - Carpe Diem. What's over your shoulder shouldn't concern you - every day is a gift. Whatever happens, you have to deal with it. I have found out that you cannot run from this.
No, I'm not stoned or on heavy meds. Just imparting some worldly bits of drivel.
Carpe Diem.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Sunday, March 14, 2010
The Hurt Locker
Brilliant, intense, sad etc. etc. Of course it's violent. What did you expect? If I had only one wish right now it would be for every coalition soldier to leave Iraq and Afghanistan yesterday! This is not an anti-war statement but an honest to goodness desire for this all to end. It's no wonder this movie won so many awards. I try and remain somewhat apolitical on my blog, so my apologies to anyone who reads too much into this.
Carpe Diem.
Carpe Diem.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
My therapy
Over the past couple of months I have written about and spoken to a number of different people who are battling and suffering from various forms of cancer. I have found this very therapeutic for me and certainly very enlightening and eye opening. I am simply amazed at how the same specific disease can have such differing outcomes. Some stories are truly heartbreaking but honestly, which ones aren't? I'm not implying that my lot in life is now to comfort the ill because that would be a load of "bollocks". But I do know that there are times that I have been through certain procedures and drug therapies and I can give my point of view and experiences.
There are so many days that go by that I wished I was completely ignorant about any of this and that my life was plugging along normally. Well, that ain't the reality. So I deal with the reality anyway I can. What all cancer patients endure is the unknown. Will it spread, will it come back, will I suffer, what am I leaving behind. You have to have a combination of faith, optimism and hope. Surround yourself with the best medical advice and treatment (if possible), the most supportive and loving family and friends and throw in a loving and faithful pet (Max) and voila. And always remember, that your life is better defined by not the quantity of years but the quality. So far I believe that I have had 53 quality years (for the most part :)).
Carpe Diem.
There are so many days that go by that I wished I was completely ignorant about any of this and that my life was plugging along normally. Well, that ain't the reality. So I deal with the reality anyway I can. What all cancer patients endure is the unknown. Will it spread, will it come back, will I suffer, what am I leaving behind. You have to have a combination of faith, optimism and hope. Surround yourself with the best medical advice and treatment (if possible), the most supportive and loving family and friends and throw in a loving and faithful pet (Max) and voila. And always remember, that your life is better defined by not the quantity of years but the quality. So far I believe that I have had 53 quality years (for the most part :)).
Carpe Diem.
Visit with the cardiologist
Today I had an echo cardiogram (ultrasound) and an EEG. The cardiologist was very pleased with both tests. The only slight downside is that since my diagnosis 2 years ago, my heart rate has been faster then normal. High normal. Go figure! He is going to keep me on some meds that slow down the rate and I will be checked again in 3 months. He also said I was looking well and was very pleased with my overall condition. Wow. Again, I prefer all this to the alternative.
Carpe Diem.
Carpe Diem.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Bio 2 (Round 1)
Another smooth round. The blood work and vitals were good. I've porked out and gained 2 more lbs and I'm tolerating the Avastin well. It's kind of weird because you don't want to jinx yourself with all the good news but the truth is I'll take it! The combination of good medical results, feeling good and looking good have to account for something so I'm enjoying it while I can.
Carpe Diem.
Carpe Diem.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
The Oscars
Wonderful news about a friend of ours. She won an Oscar for best documentary short called "Music by Prudence". Elinor Burkett is married to Dennis Gaboury. Dennis is the person that I am involved with in ZimKids. I am so thrilled for Elli. She and Dennis are two of the most wonderful and giving people I know. I have included a couple of links for you to look at. Let all the information guide you before you formulate any opinion as to what occurred during the Oscars broadcast.
http://www.liyanatour.com/index.cfm
http://oscar.go.com/nominations/nominees/music-by-prudence/3226
Carpe Diem.
http://www.liyanatour.com/index.cfm
http://oscar.go.com/nominations/nominees/music-by-prudence/3226
Carpe Diem.
Friday, March 5, 2010
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)