Well….where should I start!!??
As you all know this has been a pretty intense and thoroughly gruelling time for me. It seems like I have so much to report but it’s all been quite grim.
After my appointment with Dr Drilon I went back on the Cabo and it was even more difficult than before. The side effects were extensive and nothing seemed to get easy. I’m sure that the general depression that I was in did not help me at all to tolerate these side effects. It has been difficult to eat and even to communicate as my voice has been affected and I can hardly talk. Eating made me feel nauseous and honestly the desire to do so wasn’t there at all! Fatigue is overwhelming and of course all I wanted to do was sleep all day.
I know that my family spent a great deal of time trying to motivate me to eat, drink, move and do all the ‘normal stuff’ but honestly all I wanted to do was go back home and try to get over these physically debilitating feelings.
I know I scared them as I got more and more sick but there was no way I could possibly have behaved differently as I just felt too sick.
After two weeks of this I made up a plan to go home and to come off the meds for a while until at least I could see and feel that I was feeling better.
Then the big sister arrived and scuppered the plans!
Let me assure you all that I have had the most exceptional care from all my family. My Mom, my kids, my small sister Phil and brother in law Howard and all my nieces and nephews and other brother in law Gerry have been there for my every whim and need. What I just wanted was to go home.
Once I was off the oxygen and didn’t need an inhaler all I could focus on was getting back to my apartment in Baltimore.
I had my plan, wrote my to do list that Rus checked after a lengthy discussion as to why I needed to go. Of course, she added her own list! I was determined to get on a bus and go back to Baltimore and I could see the disapproval and worry but that is exactly what I did.
And here I am. Have shopped, cooked, slept and watched footie and I am feeling a bit better. I have had my heart checked and my meds changed by my wonderful heart doc. I am not going back to New York until the 26th November and then I will make the decision as to the next stage of my treatment. All I need to do now is get stronger and feel good.
Remember I just went to New York for a few days when all the gall bladder stuff kicked off. So every plan went belly up. Our plans to go to Africa will now be postponed till next year so I have been busy with that too. I want to go visit my Mom in Florida too and I’m sure I will come up with some other plans for travel.
I will try to keep you all posted and just to say again that the support and love from all my family and friends has been amazing and I am now doing things my way! Haha!